"Boys are beyond the range of anybody’s sure understanding, at least when they are between the ages of 18 months and 90 years.

— James Thurber, writer

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Things I've Learned About My Boys

This is reposted from my personal blog (written 2/11/10):

Today I started thinking about all the little things I've learned about my boys. I started making a list and thought it would be fun to share.

1- They love to carry small things (toys, decorations, items from nature, etc) around in anything with a handle (Baskets, including Easter baskets, old purses, lunch boxes, book bags, etc).

Aiden got a new Lightening McQueen lunch box the other day and it has seen a lot of use since we brought it home. He has been carrying around all his special toys, such as his prized Dirt Track Lightening McQueen, a spider man doll, and anything else that fits.

2-Kids love to climb. The higher, the better! Fear is not in their definition.

Yesterday with our 4-H group we took a cold winter walk at a nearby park. At the park we stopped at the playground which has a really cool log cabin structure for kids to climb. Aiden, who is my daredevil, was walking across the beams without a care in the world. I on the other hand was bracing myself because only a few days before we had to take him to the ER to get 9 stitches on a 2cm gash in his cheek. Despite my worries he was having a good time.

3-Kids have no concept of time or deadlines. They do not care if we have to be somewhere at a certain time. Time is irrelevant to them.

The other day I had to pick up my niece from school at 11:30am. I told the boys several times that we needed to leave the house by a certain time so that we would be there before she got out of school. Said time came around and they had no urgency to leave like I did. As I watched the clock creeping forward my stress level started to creep up, but they were cool as a cucumber and did not know what the rush was all about. Even when I tried to evoke empathy about how cousin would feel if there was noone to pick her up they still didn't budge. Why worry about this thing Time when they could play with their toys?

4-Kids love finger food or anything they can eat with their hands. Put the food on a stick and it's even better.

On a website a few years ago I found an entry about Muffin Tin Monday... On Monday you serve up finger food in a muffin tin. Occassionally I will serve lunch this way and it is always a hit with the boys. Just the other day Ehric was asking when the next Muffin Tin Monday would be. I have found that when I serve food in bite size pieces that they can pick up that the boys eat a lot more.

5-Kids are messy! The mess doesn't bother them. So get used to it!

I love this quote "Cleaning the house while your kid's are still growing, is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing." So true!!

6-Kids love to help if you let them.

My boys love to load the washing machine. In fact sometimes they fight over who gets to load the washer, because loaded the dryer apparently is not as much fun. To make it fair to both parties I have had one load the washer and then when they were done take all the clothes out and have the other boy load the washer again. You want to be fair right?

Besides loading the washer they love to help cook. Lately Ehric has been getting more helpful by using sharp knives to cut fruits and veggies. Just wish he would wait for Momma to help him.

7-Just when they frustrate you they do something to make you proud.

Today I spent most of the day conquering clutter upstairs. Occassionally the boys would come up and spin circles around me and get into everything. At one point I told them to go downstairs. Later, I heard the vacuum cleaner going downstairs. I peaked down and saw the boys vacuuming the carpet. When I later came downstairs Ehric said, "Do you like how we cleaned the carpet?" Amazing how fast my frustration melted.

8-Kids never go to sleep when you want them too!

Until recently we had always had a family bed, and the boys would go to bed when we went to bed or vice versa. I loved having the boys follow their own natural rhythms but I would get agitated when it was 10pm and they were still up and I couldn't get done the things that I wanted to do. I love my boys dearly but I am the type of person that really draws energy from alone time and having them around me 24-7 was really depleting my energy and making me grouchy.

So recently the boys have graduated into sleeping together in their own room and going to bed earlier. I miss the snuggles, but I really relish the time I get to just do my own thing. However, now that I am trying to carve out that "me time" I start to get antsy when it is 7pm or 7:30pm or 8pm and they are still not in their bed or the lights are not out. I am up in the air about setting a set time for them to go to bed because I know they really enjoy our bedtime routine and life happens. Besides someday they won't be begging me for one more book or to tell them one more story. I guess I just need to go with the flow.

9-They love us unconditionally!

There are days that go as easy as pie and then there are days when things hit the fan. On those days I scream like a banchy when I step in a spilled drink that no one bothered to clean up, or freak out that we are running out of time to get someplace and no one cares. But despite my behavior my little men still want me to read them a book, draw me a picture or tell me they love me. I love that they love me unconditionally and love me for who I am.

10-They are not afraid to be themselves. They are whole persons and are utterly amazing!

Throughout the day my boys go through so many ranges of emotion. They laugh, cry, leap for joy and do it all over again. They express their likes and dislikes and do not stiffle their emotions. They lay it all on the line whether we like it or not. If Aiden is hungry and wants a PB& J he doesn't care if we have a to-do list a mile long. His hunger doesn't have a pause button. If Ehric has something to say or if he is curious about something he is going to ask. If only we were all so intune to ourselves the way children are...what a different world would we live in.

Wow! They truly have taught me a lot. Motherhood is quite the learning experience and I am only 5 1/2 years in!
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